This is my realm of pain, in which I explain my perspectives on pain and how it can play a role in a session.
Most people, and this includes many people who are part of the BDSM scene, consider that anyone who is 'into pain' is a masochist, and once the label has been assigned, that is that. Most people have their own view of what a masochist is and so if you are into pain, you are instantly dropped into the appropriate box in their mind and there is nothing more to be said.
In fact, different people for whom pain is an important part of their BDSM life have very different needs and pain plays many different roles.
There are indeed those - pure - masochists for whom the sensation of pain is very different from most of us, and they can derive great pleasure and satisfaction from extreme activities, involving needles, blades or electricity, say, which for most people would cause unbearable pain. This is true masochism and there are certainly a number of my regular visitors for whom this is their thing.
There are also those who use pain as punishment, pure and simple. The punishment is painful and unpleasant but has a beneficial effect. This is how I use pain to discipline and control my little boy thomas, and I will let him describe what this is like in his own words...
'For me, real, painful punishment is a very important part of my relationship with my Mistress, Princess Lucina. i have various targets relating to my behaviour which i must meet, and any failure is punished with the appropriate number of strokes of the cane. i am not a masochist and the punishment sessions are no roleplay. Each stroke of the cane is very painful indeed and i am usually in tears by the end of a punishment. If i have been particularly naughty i dread the opening of the door when i visit Princess Lucina for my punishment.
Certain targets are very special to Princess Lucina and if i fail on these then the special severe cane is used at full strength and i know that this will be agony.
The reason i put myself through this is the wonderful feeling of closure, of relief, and of closeness i feel to my Mistress after a punishment. i know that my sins have been forgiven and that we can start again. The process of being beaten itself is very intimate and even while i am being beaten and screwing my face up in agony i am very conscious of the bond that exists between us during a punishment.
Over the years i have seen many professional Mistresses in order to try to find this perfect recipe, and it's fair to say that no-one else has come close to understanding my needs until i met Princess Lucina. It has taken four years of careful adjustment and evolution to get to the point we are at now, and the result for me is that i get more done in my life as i fear the punishment for failing to do so, and i have a general feeling of wellbeing which has never fully been there before.'
thomas.
Another reason that people are attracted to pain is the phenomenon called sub-space, and this is something which i believe almost anyone who comes to visit me is capable of appreciating and finding fulfilment from.
The human body responds to pain using a number of physiological mechanisms, such as the release of endorphins. But these mechanisms alter the body's chemistry and in certain circumstances can generate something akin to a high. It is possible to bring someone to this state very slowly and quite gently so that the experience is never unpleasantly painful. For example a light whipping can be given which slowly causes the skin to redden but is not painful. As the body starts to respond the severity can be increased without further pain being felt. In the extreme the body becomes in such a state of endorphin high that no pain is felt at all and it would be possible to do physical damage without any unpleasant sensation being felt.
There are very few people who are not capable of experiencing something similar to what I have described above, but many are very nervous of taking this step as they feel that they will quickly hit their limit and find the whole thing unpleasant.
In practice it is very easy to ensure that nothing untoward happens, using a system of safewords and ensuring that - at least in the early stages of training - nothing happens in a session which hasn't been discussed and agreed beforehand.
More to come...